ZimbabweWedding

With all these rules and lofty ideals you would think I would have a plan for finding a wife. My original set of rules was simple. She had to be involved in Engineering, Math or Science of some sort. She of course had to be a brunette. The last and most important rule was she had to like to go bowling. If a woman likes to bowl then she will pretty much like to do anything. I was young and little did I know you can not make up rules for love. I gave up on the first two but I still believe in the bowling rule.

It was October 1992 and the University of Florida was playing the University of Georgia in the Gator bowl. I try not to miss this game because I went to high school in Jacksonville and it gave me a chance to visit old friends. In 1992, I had moved beyond the college life and spent most of my time trying to build the company that I started in 1989. Lisa, who was an old friend from college had gotten married to Bernie, her high school sweetheart, and they had just bought a house in Jacksonville. Everyone was invited and she had a house full that weekend. I was solo and content to visit with old friends for a short break that weekend. This is where Karen enters the story. Karen's sister Kris was a friend in college and a sorority sister of Lisa our hostess for the weekend. Karen went to Auburn University for college but knew that Gators could party and tagged along for the world's largest cocktail party-the Florida/Georgia Game. Things just happen..... because Karen and I would have never met if not for a very long list of circumstances. We still argue today about who kissed who first but it all goes back to my belief that the woman is the smarter and more manipulative of the sexes. So even if I did kiss her first she made me do it. Karen had a strength and beauty about her that I had never met before.

I lived in Gainesville and Karen lived in Boca Raton a long five hour drive apart. Destiny continued its path because I found myself traveling to Boca for work at the IBM facility. Karen and I started dating but the distance made it hard. The following summer a group trip was planned to Alaska for a two week vacation. This was my first official two week vacation and the longest amount of time I would spend with Karen. Alaska was rough at first and without any planning I purchased a motorcycle in Fairbanks, Alaska for our transportation during our stay. It was actually cheaper than renting a car. Karen was excited about the adventure and charged head first into the role of a motorcycle chick. She held on for dear life, froze her butt off and was responsible for wearing the backpack with our gear as we traveled down the open roads of Alaska at 100 MPH. I was in love and I had no idea if Karen liked to bowl.

I returned home to Gainesville and found my old college lifestyle didn't fit anymore. Two weeks later I moved to Boca Raton to start a new life with Karen in it. I wasn't sure if she wanted this but I was coming to find out if I had found a wife. Five years into our relationship we were still dating without a breakup or even a fight. Friends and family kept asking, "When are you going to get married?" The problem for me is that I didn't really know who I was or who I would become and that made it difficult for me to ask that big question, "Will you marry me?" After all I didn't know who me was. We had a huge impact on each other and we both began to change in ways that made us better people. We were happy and knew we would spend the rest of our lives together. Karen was working 70 hours a week and I was always away working on a project. I had worked very hard to maintain a stress free life but the corporate world had given Karen a big case of stress anxiety. This was actually the cause of the very few fights we had. I tried to be a supportive partner but I was determined to have Karen come home smiling and not exhausted from the stress of the day. I didn't want her to quit her job but wanted to make her realize it was not worth all the money she was making if she couldn't enjoy it. She responded one night by saying, "Fine I will quit my job and I want to travel around the world for a year." Without thinking I replied, "When do we leave?" The cleverer of the two sexes said, "January 1998, in six months." I had been setup and my life was again about to change, again.

I pride myself on my creativity and the way in which you pop the question is the ultimate creative challenge. I had a plan and Karen was working into my big master plan. Who was I kidding, I was scared to death but together we would see the world and discover ourselves along the way. Karen wanted to leave in January but I could not get my act together at work. The date kept slipping and slipping. With Valentine's Day on the horizon I saw my chance. Our first stop was Angel Falls in Venezuela and I would ask Karen to marry. We actually did not arrive to Canima National Park until February 15 and we would not get to Angel Falls until the 17th. Time was running out and I proposed in front of Hatcha Falls and took Karen by complete surprise. She answered a quick yes and the two of us were on our way.



In eight months of traveling you really get to know a person. In fact, Karen and I have not spent more than twenty hours apart in the last eight months together. We are best friends, partners and in love. If you think about it we have spent more time together in the last eight months than most married couples spend together in their entire lives. We still didn't know where we would get married but it would be special and during our trip. We had copies of our birth certificates and all we needed was a special place to tie the knot. We both wanted friends and family at our wedding but it would be a little tough in a foreign country for everyone to attend. We both realized that we would be the only two at our wedding and somehow it seemed like that is the way it should be.

This brings us to Victoria Falls, Zimbabwe and the place we would get married. Karen came across a wedding book in Johannesburg that mentioned you could get married at the Victoria Falls Hotel. We signed up for a twenty day overland camping tour from Cape Town through the deserts of Namibia, Botswana and our final destination Victoria Falls, Zimbabwe. For those of you still pondering the bowling question let me put your mind at rest. Karen does not mind bowling but it is not her first choice of activities. I also like to bowl but it is not my first choice of sporting activities. Karen even owns her own bowling ball and shoes that I gave her as a Birthday present one year. A word of advice, do not buy your girlfriend sporting gear as a gift. It ranks right up there with the giving of kitchen appliances. Karen took it in good stride and I love her even more because of it.

We arrived on Friday in Victoria Falls and started asking about getting married. We presented ourselves at the customer service desk of the Vic Falls Hotel and were told it would take at least two months to get the proper paperwork. According to the rules we had to advertise in our home newspaper for three weeks our intent to marry. We also had to prove that we are currently not married. Karen and I both looked at each other and thanked the nice lady for her help. We set off for the tourist information office to ask more questions. We would be getting married at Victoria Falls.

The tourist office directed us to Dahaba Safaris and our wedding planner Liz. We had no dress, no tux and all we wanted to do was get married. We also wanted it to be a wedding we would never forget. Liz is the kind of person you want involved with any project you are working on. She was born in Victoria Falls and she and her husband run a successful travel service in the area. She also does weddings every once in a while..for fun. We met with Liz Monday morning at 10:00 AM and by 3:00 PM she had everything arranged. The wedding bands had been ordered, the material for the dress was on its way and she knew someone with a tux my size. We are in the middle of a country where it is impossible to make a phone call and this all happened in five hours. The magistrate would perform the legal ceremony and we asked about meeting with Father Thomas the Catholic Priest in the area. Liz explained to us that Father Thomas only does weddings in the Church and the Church is a little run down. We wanted to be married on the river and Liz knew exactly what we wanted. Karen and I both knew we were in good hands.

We booked a room at the Vic Falls Hotel for our honeymoon night and ran into Father Thomas. Karen is Catholic and it would really mean a lot to her if the wedding was blessed by a priest. Liz asked Father Thomas if he was available Thursday afternoon for a wedding. He smiled and without hesitating said he would be happy to do it. He told us to get a copy of Karen's Baptismal certificate and a letter from the Church saying she had never been married. Not only would he do the blessing but he would marry us within the eyes of the Catholic Church. Karen and I could not believe our luck it was working out so nicely. In three days we would be married.

Liz took us to Vicki's house who would be making Karen's dress. Her garage looked like a dressing room filled with costumes and outfits from the numerous plays they produced. Karen picked out her pattern and I tried on the borrowed tux. It was a perfect fit and the only thing missing was a cummerbund. No problem says Vicki, they had just finished a production of the Rocky Horror Picture Show and I could wear the cummerbund worn by Brad. All I needed was a pair of dress shoes and a hair cut and I would be ready.

Karen had a couple things to do on her very short list and they all involved being pampered. The Elephant Hills Inter Continental Hotel had just opened a day spa and Karen signed up for the works. After eight months on the road you can get a little dirty. In fact, I signed up for a facial and some eyebrow shaping. If you have never had your eyebrows plucked guys, you should try it. Women get it done all the time only reconfirming my belief that they are tougher than men.

Wedding day arrived and we checked in early to the Vic Falls Hotel. Up until now, we have been camping for the last twenty-six days. Even during our six days in Victoria Falls we camped in the city camp ground for $4 a night. Our new accommodations cost $378 a night. We wanted to check-in early and check-out late to get our money's worth. A little sun at the pool and the need to recover from our impromptu combined bachelor-bachelorette party - three of us drank an entire bottle of Jack Daniels. Karen was off for her makeup and hair appointment. I would get cleaned up, put on my tux and disappear until 4:00 PM for pictures.

Karen arrived in the lobby a little past 4:00 PM and she was a stunning bride. The dress was a perfect fit and a style that made Karen sparkle. I wasn't nervous and couldn't wait to be married. If we would have done this at home I am sure I would have been a wreck. Instead, I was smiling and thinking about the next 80 years. I could tell Karen was relaxed and anxious to see Palm Island. We had complete faith in Liz and knew that the site she had picked out would be perfect.

A short drive to the Zambezi River at the top of Victoria Falls and we board our boat to Palm Island. This was the first time we saw the river and I couldn't imagine it could be so beautiful. We arrived on the Island and found a wedding paradise. The magistrate performed the legal ceremony and just like that, Karen and I were married. Father Thomas conducted a beautiful ceremony and the exchanging of rings. In the middle of the Zambezi River we were now married in the Catholic Church. Who would have thought? A toast to our new family in Zimbabwe and on to our sunset cruise. I almost forgot to mention our special guests at the wedding... two elephants in attendance and a group of loud hippos. When Father Thomas asked, "If anyone here knows of any reason why these two should not be married?" After a short pause the hippos burst out in loud approval. Karen and I are truly blessed and our good fortune seems to have no bounds. Somehow I had just attended the most incredible wedding imaginable and it turned out to be ours.

I look forward to a long life of happiness, family and love with Karen Willis my wife, partner and best friend.